


Merry Christmas!!

by lol-phan-af (lol_phan_af)



Series: 1-800-did-I-ask [92]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Christmas Eve, Crying, Multi, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-26
Updated: 2016-12-26
Packaged: 2018-09-12 07:51:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,770
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9063094
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lol_phan_af/pseuds/lol-phan-af
Summary: macaroni fUCK: I show up at my house in Complete and Utter Darknessjmadzzz: oh god





	

**macaroni fUCK** : I show up at my house in Complete and Utter Darkness  
  
**jmadzzz** : oh god  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : my sisters let me in and I can't even say hello before they SCREAM  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : ""IS THAT A RING??""  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : DISTANTLY, MY MOMS BEDROOM DOOR FLIES THE FUCK OPEN  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : IM HERDED INTO THE KITCHEN BEFORE I CAN EVEN A NS WE R THE QUESTION  
  
**jmadzzz** : oh my g o d  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : THEY ALL LEFT TO MAKE TEA AND IM SITTING HERE DYING PLEASE SAVE ME  
  
**jmadzzz** : I wish I could love  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : they just asked me if I was engaged to You specifically like w h  o  e l s e  
  
**jmadzzz** : you do have another boyfriend  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : yeah but they don't know about alex  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : I should probably tell them tbh  
  
**jmadzzz** : they all follow you on instagram  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : yeah but they haven't asked about him yet which is odd  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : maybe I'm not being obvious enough  
  
**jmadzzz** : you call him your boyfriend in all of them idk how much more obvious you can get dear  
  
**jmadzzz** : oh I forgot to like the one from the ball that's v cute  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : aw ty  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : also what are you doing?¿  
  
**jmadzzz** : me and nelly are sitting in the living room watching moana and eating popcorn talking abt you  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : why me  
  
**jmadzzz** : bc we just got engaged?? and I love you?? and I'm Really gay??  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : omg  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : I love you too!!  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : also how tf are you watching moana  
  
**jmadzzz** : my little cousins Really Wanted it and when they want things  
  
**jmadzzz** : they get them  
  
**jmadzzz** : it's why my four year old cousin has three horses  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : I  
  
**jmadzzz** : aren't you talking to your mom and sisters??  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : they still haven't come back with tea yet  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : NVM HERE THEY ARE  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : BYE JAMES I LOVE YOU  
  
**jmadzzz** : love you too!!  
  
\---  
  
**johnn** : W H Y  
  
**more like HUNKules** : ITS CHRISTMAS EVE!!  
  
**little lion** : ITS SIX IN THE MORNING  
  
**laf** : THE SUN ISNT EVEN UP YET  
  
**more like HUNKules** : WE HAVE TO START MAKING FOOD  
  
**laf** : WE'RE NOT EATING UNTIL FIVE  
  
**johnn** : WE HAVE TO GO BACK TO S LE E P  
  
**more like HUNKules** : BUT ITS CHRISTMAS!!  
  
**little lion** : GET BACK IN BED  
  
**more like HUNKules** : FINE  
  
\---  
  
**more like HUNKules** : suffocating  
  
**little lion** : tragic  
  
**johnn** : you're not allowed to get back up until nine at Least  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I can't get up you're all lying on top of me  
  
**laf** : you love us  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I do  
  
**little lion** : aw  
  
**johnn** : we love you to!!  
  
**more like HUNKules** : !!!  
  
**laf** : s l e E P  
  
\---  
  
**jmadzzz** : my mom said that we have to come down on new years so she can see you  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : omg did you tell them??  
  
**jmadzzz** : yes!! they're all v v happy for us!!  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : I love you so much  
  
**jmadzzz** : I love you too  
  
**jmadzzz** : god I can't wait to be married to you  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : and now, thomas cries into his frosted flakes and his sisters read his text messages over his shoulder and tEASE HIM ABOUT IT  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : I AM A GROWN MAN I DONT DESERVE THIS  
  
**jmadzzz** : th o m as  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : I just !!!  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : I can't wait to be married to you either!! I've loved you for so long and now I get to marry you and I'm so lucky and I !!  
  
**jmadzzz** : I really want to kiss you rn  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : same!!!  
  
**jmadzzz** : three days  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : I'm counting down the minutes until then  
  
\---  
  
**johnn** : alex is wearing his christmas stockings rn and I'm so in love with him  
  
**little lion** : huSH  
  
**johnn** : it's christmas let me be gross  
  
**little lion** : it's christmas eve love  
  
**johnn** : then let me be partially gross in preparation to be even worse tomorrow  
  
**little lion** : fine but come on we have to go help make food  
  
**johnn** : I'm not gonna be able to focus  
  
**little lion** : omg  
  
**johnn** : wanna make out before we go downstairs??  
  
**little lion** : of course  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : gET DOWN HER E  
  
**little lion** : coming!!  
  
**johnn** : omg what did you just drop  
  
**laf** : hercules saw the stockings and dropped like four pots  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I just  
  
**more like HUNKules** : his thi g hs  
  
**johnn** : RELATABLE  
  
**little lion** : y'all are ridiculous  
  
**little lion** : I love you  
  
**laf** : we love you too!!  
  
**more like HUNKules** : but also come down here bc we're making pancakes  
  
**johnn** : PANCAKES  
  
\---  
  
**hugh lowercase** : OH MY  G OD  
  
**more like HUNKules** : IM SO SORRY  
  
**more like HUNKules** : WE KIND OF FORGOT YOU WERE HERE  
  
**hugh lowercase** : WHY DO NONE OF YOU WEAR PANTS EVER  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I mean??  
  
**more like HUNKules** : what's the point?? it's not like we have anyone to Impress  
  
**hugh lowercase** : s t i l l  
  
**more like HUNKules** : let us liVE  
  
**more like HUNKules** : also did you see alex??  
  
**hugh lowercase** : ,,,,,,,,yes  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I love him  
  
**hugh lowercase** : aw  
  
**more like HUNKules** : anyway if you give us ten minutes you can come back out and we'll probably have pants on  
  
**hugh lowercase** : ""probably""  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I really can't make promises with them they're very distracting  
  
**hugh lowercase** : I  
  
**more like HUNKules** : they're so beautiful I just???  
  
**hugh lowercase** : we'll be out in ten minutes  
  
**more like HUNKules** : right  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : THEY SAW MY STOCKINGS  
  
**laf** : omg leave them on  
  
**little lion** : N O  
  
**johnn** : you're so cute though  
  
**little lion** : IM GOING TO DIE HERE  
  
**laf** : but they've already seen them so why hide Art  
  
**little lion** : HIS PARENTS HAVENT  
  
**johnn** : b a b e  
  
**little lion** : COME HERE AND UNCLIP MY GARTER BELT  
  
**johnn** : fine but just know that I don't want to  
  
**little lion** : ILL PUT IT BACK ON TONIGHT JUST GET ME OUT OF IT  
  
**johnn** : I'm comin  
  
**little lion** : THANK YOU  
  
\---  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : I wake up and randolph and anne are just  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : here  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : on my bedroom floor dead asleep  
  
**jmadzzz** : why??  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : I have no clue??  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : okay so they just woke up and yelled at me for not telling them I was engaged  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : idk how they even found out?? nobody else is awake??  
  
**jmadzzz** : it's like noon??  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : yeah but my family doesn't go All Out on christmas eve like yours does  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : we're a ""nothing happens until After presents are opened"" family  
  
**jmadzzz** : right  
  
**jmadzzz** : a lot of my family actually isn't here actually and my parents are really desperate for help so they're letting me cook  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : you're good at cooking idk why they're so hesitant  
  
**jmadzzz** : I almost lit my house on fire  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : okay fair  
  
**jmadzzz** : THE PASTA IS BURNING I GOTTA GO  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : j e  s us  
  
\---  
  
**martha** : I swear to shit y'all better like your christmas presents  
  
**the coolest brother you got** : is this directed at us??  
  
**the good henry** : bc if so I know what I got and I'm excited  
  
**martha** : it was @our brother and his spouses but how do you know what you got  
  
**the good henry** : you made me wrap it??  
  
**martha** : s h it  
  
**more like HUNKules** : you didn't have to get us stuff  
  
**little lion** : honestly  
  
**johnn** : also why are you afraid that we won't like it??  
  
**martha** : my martha is yelling bc she doesn't think it's okay that we got you joint gifts bc you probably didn't get us joint gifts and she's v stressed so I will kill you  
  
**johnn** : we didn't get you joint gifts but that's because we all had separate Ideas that Would Not have worked together  
  
**laf** : also the fact that you got us stuff at all is so nice!!  
  
**johnn** : !!  
  
**little lion** : !!  
  
**more like HUNKules** : !!  
  
**the good henry** : ew  
  
**little lion** : how d a r e you  
  
**martha manning** : THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR TELLING ME THAT  
  
**martha manning** : I CAN R E ST  
  
**martha** : she just collapsed on our bed  
  
**martha manning** : david is laughing at me how rude  
  
**david** : you're just really cute I can't help it  
  
**martha manning** : h u sh  
  
**little lion** : aw!!  
  
**martha** : we'll be over in a few hours!!  
  
**johnn** : lmao you're helping us cook you don't get to not  
  
**martha** : that's fine  
  
**johnn** : okay bye!!  
  
**martha** : bye!!  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : are you okay  
  
**laf** : yes  
  
**little lion** : just checking  
  
**laf** : you don't have to do this every time I'm anxious you know  
  
**little lion** : you're always anxious so technically I really don't do it often  
  
**laf** : touché  
  
**little lion** : you know that me doing this doesn't bother me right??  
  
**little lion** : like you're my spouse and I love you so much and taking care of you isn't and never will be a problem for me  
  
**laf** : thank you so much I love you too  
  
**little lion** : is there anything that's Really bothering you??  
  
**laf** : not really  
  
**laf** : just the normal Christmas Anxiety and the !!!! of it all  
  
**little lion** : okay  
  
**little lion** : however I will continue to worry about you and if you ever need to leave or need any of us for Anything just tell us  
  
**laf** : I will  
  
**laf** : I'm so lucky I have you all  
  
**little lion** : we're the lucky ones love  
  
**laf** : omg  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : what do we have left to do??  
  
**little lion** : finish cooking, get dressed, ????get jolly????  
  
**laf** : WHERE'S MY BUCHE DE NOEL  
  
**little lion** : in the fridge!!  
  
**laf** : !!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
\---  
  
**johnn** : lafayette is always very french but like when they start getting Really French and they're !!! abt it it's sO cute  
  
**laf** : oNE DAY JOHN LAURENS  
  
**laf** : ONE DAY I'M GOING TO TAKE YOU TO FRANCE AND YOU ARE GOING TO SEE  E V E R Y T H I N G  
  
**johnn** : omg  
  
**laf** : THE THREE MOST BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE IVE EVER MET IN THE MOST!! BEAUTIFUL PLACE AND ME RIGHT IN THE CENTER WATCHING AS MY TWO HOMES MEET  
  
**johnn** : o m g  
  
**laf** : ONE DAY  
  
\---  
  
**jmadzzz** : and after burning the pasta, breaking a saucepan, dropping a wooden spoon on a stove burner that was turned on high, melting a plastic bowl in the microwave, and shattering an antique glass butter tray, I am kicked out of the kitchen and will not be allowed back in indefinitely  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : jesus christ james  
  
**jmadzzz** : I'm not good in kitchens that I'm not comfortable with  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : evidently  
  
**jmadzzz** : besides I'm glad I got kicked out  
  
**jmadzzz** : ambrose kept showing off and I was two seconds away from stuffing him into the oven and turning it on the highest temperature it can go to  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : you should've  
  
**jmadzzz** : your enthusiasm for the murder of my brother worries me  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : hey if someone hurts you my hatred is fair game  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : it's boundless  
  
**jmadzzz** : you're ridiculous  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : you know it  
  
\---  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I'm 200% do n e with alex  
  
**laf** : ???  
  
**more like HUNKules** : he's wearing christmas bauble earrings and I just  
  
**laf** : REALLY  
  
**more like HUNKules** : YES  
  
**little lion** : IM YELLING THEYRE SO LITTLE AND CUTE  
  
**little lion** : THIS IS THE BEST PURCHASE I EVER MADE  
  
**little lion** : SOMEONE COME KISS ME  
  
**more like HUNKules** : OMW  
  
**johnn** : COMING  
  
**laf** : IM R U N NIN G UP THE STAIRS  
  
**little lion** : oh dear  
  
\---  
  
**martha** : WE'RE HERE FUCKERS  
  
**the good henry** : ITS SO FUCKING COLD IN YOUR HALLWAY  
  
**more like HUNKules** : OKAY WELL WE'RE NOWHERE NEAR DONE COOKING SO  
  
**the coolest brother you got** : ARE YOU KIDDIGN  
  
**little lion** : WE TOLD YOU THAT YOUD HAVE TO HELP US COOK  
  
**johnn** : ALSO IF YOU DONT START EATING BEFORE YOU COME OVER ON HOLIDAYS WE WILL NOT INVITE YOU  
  
**the coolest brother you got** : RUDE  
  
**laf** : WE HAVE LIKE TWELVE BOXES OF CANDY CANES THO IF YOU WANT SNACKS  
  
**johnn** : eleven  
  
**laf** : h  o  w  
  
**johnn** : it was four in the morning, me and alex were up and St a r vin g, you said we had to save the pasta  
  
**johnn** : we improvised  
  
**laf** : you two worry me  
  
**johnn** : ha h a  
  
**laf** : I  
  
**martha** : why twelve boxes  
  
**johnn** : eleven  
  
**martha** : w ha t e v  er  
  
**johnn** : I accidentally put candy canes on all of our shopping lists  
  
**the good henry** : you have separate shopping lists??  
  
**little lion** : we separate walmart into four sections and each of us take a section  
  
**little lion** : our lists correspond with the section we go to  
  
**johnn** : grocery shopping takes like twenty minutes for us if we're Determined  
  
**little lion** : usually it takes way longer tho bc we get distracted and then end up all meeting in on aisle and looking at bags of chips for ten minutes  
  
**the coolest brother you got** : I don't want to think about grocery shopping with you  
  
**johnn** : THAT WAS ONE TIME  
  
**the coolest brother you got** : YOU WERE BUYING LUBE IN FRONT OF MY CHILD EYES  
  
**the good henry** : W H A T  
  
**the good henry** : I NE  V E R HEARD THIS STORY  
  
**the coolest brother you got** : BASICALLY JOHN IS GROSS AND I DONT TRUST HIM  
  
**johnn** : I  
  
**little lion** : IT WASNT THAT BAD  
  
**the coolest brother you** **got** : YOUR PRIVATE CHAT  
  
**little lion** : ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,  
  
**the good henry** : WHA T  
  
**the coolest brother you got** : JUST LET ME IN YOUR HOUSE PLEASE  
  
**more like HUNKules** : IM COMING  
  
**the coolest brother you got** : BLESS  
  
\---  
  
**martha manning** : why is your christmas tree so huge  
  
**johnn** : we had to buy one so that it didn't look small compared to hercules and lafayette  
  
**little lion** : it's seven feet tall  
  
**martha manning** : jesus  
  
**laf** : and when you don't have a ladder but you Do have a husband who insists putting the tree topper on  
  
**laf** : your shoulders pay the price  
  
**more like HUNKules** : it's v cute we have pictures  
  
**little lion** : I have a video!!  
  
**johnn** : HUSHSH  
  
**laf** : H A  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : idk how hercules and elizabeth can just talk like people  
  
**laf** : like??  
  
**johnn** : RIGHT  
  
**johnn** : LIKE S I X YEARS OF DATING EACH OTHER  
  
**laf** : AND THEN TEN YEARS AFTER YOU START DATING YOUR BROTHER DATES HER AND IS STILL DATING HER  
  
**laf** : AND YOURE JUST TALKING ABOUT DOGS CASUALLY  
  
**johnn** : I KNOWOWO  
  
**johnn** : also can we take a minute to look at my brother  
  
**laf** : he's just sitting there staring at hercules??  
  
**laf** : OH  
  
**laf** : WAIT REALLY  
  
**laf** : IS THIS LIKE AN AFTER BREAKUP CRUSH OR IS THIS LIKE A THING  
  
**johnn** : HE TOLD ME THAT BEFORE HE KNEW THAT HERCULES WAS OUR HUSBAND HE HAD A HARDCORE CRUSH ON HIM  
  
**laf** : THAT MAKES SENSE  
  
**johnn** : BUT HE ALSO SWORE ME TO SECRECY AND NOW I FEEL REALLY BAD  
  
**laf** : why did you have to sit across the table from me I can't kiss you from here  
  
**johnn** : :^((  
  
**laf** : just know that I want to  
  
**johnn** : will do  
  
**laf** : alex and mary are death staring each other from across the table this is so cute  
  
**laf** : also why did we let alex sit at the head of the table  
  
**johnn** : we said it was time to eat and he sat down there  
  
**johnn** : and then he smiled at us and we're whipped as shit so we kissed him and let it happen  
  
**laf** : ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,anyway  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : I'm so excited for you to open your presents from me  
  
**johnn** : they're all shaped the same and they're the same size  
  
**johnn** : I'm kind of worried  
  
**little lion** : omg don't be they're v cute  
  
**little lion** : actually you might scream  
  
**johnn** : oh dear  
  
**more like HUNKules** : yknow this is,,,,,technically our first christmas together  
  
**more like HUNKules** : like that's actually spent on actual christmas with the four of us  
  
**more like HUNKules** : bc I used to go home and now I get to spend holidays with you!!  
  
**little lion** : I love you so much!!  
  
**johnn** : love you hercules!!!  
  
**laf** : love you!!  
  
**more like HUNKules** : love you too!! literally so much!!  
  
**more like HUNKules** : god I can't wait to spend every christmas for the rest of my l i f e with you  
  
**laf** : aH!!  
  
**johnn** : !!!  
  
**little lion** : !!!  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : I HAVE SO MUCH FUCKIGN BUBBLE BATH I LOVE LAF SO M CUH  
  
**johnn** : yeah we could tell by the way you jumped into their lap and hardcore made out with them for a full two minutes before hercules managed to jaws of life you off of each other  
  
**little lion** : ,,,,,,,I don't have an excuse  
  
**little lion** : anyway  
  
**johnn** : honestly thanks tho bc if you weren't going to I was  
  
**johnn** : I can finally get back into painting  
  
**johnn** : I told them abt it but I didn't think they'd remember  
  
**little lion** : of course they would omg  
  
**johnn** : this is honestly gonna ruin your life  
  
**little lion** : ???  
  
**johnn** : when I used to paint I would lock myself in my room and sit there for hours  
  
**johnn** : mostly naked  
  
**little lion** : omg  
  
**johnn** : so get ready for that  
  
**little lion** : pr a y i   n g  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : HERCULES THESE SWEATERS ARE SO BEAUTIFUL  
  
**little lion** : I love how we have to text while everyone else in the circle is opening presents bc we have no self control  
  
**little lion** : but nOT AS MUCH AS I LOVE THIS SWEATER  
  
**little lion** : IT MATCHES JOHNS EYES IM THRILLED  
  
**johnn** : IM GOING TO STAB YOU  
  
**little lion** : DID YOU THINK I WAS LYING WHEN I SAID GREEN WAS MY FAVORITE COLOR BC ITS THE COLOR OF YOUR EYES  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I didn't that's why it matches  
  
**johnn** : KDVKHGKGKGHKGHKG  
  
**johnn** : I LOVE YOU  
  
**little lion** : I LOVE YOU TOO!!  
  
**johnn** : our fucking first initials are sewn on the hip too  
  
**more like HUNKules** : also all of yours are in my size so they'll be kind of Huge  
  
**johnn** : y E      S  
  
**little lion** : SCREECHES  
  
**laf** : !!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
**laf** : ALSO I CANT BELIEVE YOU FUCKING TOOK THE TIME TO SEW ""MJPYRG"" INTO MY SWEATER  
  
**more like HUNKules** : IT TOOK ME FOREVER BC I JUST KEPT LAUGHING  
  
**laf** : I LOVE YOU SO MUCH  
  
**little lion** : I CANT BELIEVE YOU WERE WORRIED ABOUT THIS NOT BEING ENOUGH FOR US THEYRE BE AU TIFUL  
  
**johnn** : JUST LIKE YOU  
  
**more like HUNKules** : om g  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I love you too!!  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : wow for someone who said smth abt alexander jumping on me for my gift  
  
**laf** : john really didn't hesitate to straight up tackle alexander for his  
  
**little lion** : there's an explanation for it!!  
  
**more like HUNKules** : ???  
  
**little lion** : well it's a photo album, as you can see  
  
**little lion** : I put in all the photos myself btw I was very careful abt it  
  
**little lion** : and it's bc since we got together you've all been posting pictures on instagram of me and us and I haven't seen them and I haven't posted any  
  
**little lion** : but that doesn't mean I didn't necessarily,,,,,,take,,,,,any  
  
**little lion** : so there's four and a half years of our relationship documented in your own photo albums  
  
**little lion** : and I just hope you like them  
  
**laf** : and there john goes again  
  
**laf** : and now they're both on the floor  
  
**laf** : and john is crying  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I love him so much  
  
**laf** : sa m e  
  
**more like HUNKules** : literally hold me  
  
**laf** : c ome h e re  
  
\---  
  
**martha** : BI BROS JACKETS  
  
**martha manning** : S C R E   A  M S  
  
**little lion** : !! IVE BEEN HIDING MINE BEHIND THE COUCH THIS WHOLE TIME WAITING FOR YOU TO OPEN THEM !!  
  
**hugh lowercase** : THEY HAVE S E Q UIN S ON THEM I LOVE IT  
  
**laf** : this is so cute  
  
**little lion** : IM CRYING OS HARD  
  
**hugh lowercase** : RT  
  
**martha** : RT  
  
**martha manning** : R T  
  
\---  
  
**jmadzzz** : you have presents from my parents to open when I get back  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : and you have presents from my mom and sisters  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : oh and randolph and anne made you a bracelet  
  
**jmadzzz** : omg really  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : yeah it's actually v cute  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : also I know they're 15 and I'm like Never here to see their gradual character development but idk when they had the time to make bracelets bc this is fucking nice  
  
**jmadzzz** : I  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : do you think if I like commissioned them they'd make me one  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : bc honestly I want one it's reALLY GOOD  
  
**jmadzzz** : ask??  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : THEY SAID THEYD DO IT  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : FIFTY BUCKS WHAT THE HELL  
  
**jmadzzz** : JESUS  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : FUCK IT I HAVE THE MONEY  
  
**jmadzzz** : tbh that's my only fear about marrying you  
  
**jmadzzz** : like I love you and being married to you is going to be great and I have no doubts that our wedding is going to be beautiful  
  
**jmadzzz** : but the wedding Itself, with your taste, is going to cost like three million dollars  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : it will nOT  
  
**jmadzzz** : if you're willing to spend $50 on a bracelet  
  
**jmadzzz** : you're going to be willing to spend $3mil on a wedding  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : I  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : okay yeah  
  
**jmadzzz** : exactly  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : john omg why are all of your siblings crying what?? what's going on??  
  
**johnn** : I kind of guessed this would happen but I didn't think they'd be sobbing  
  
**little lion** : ???  
  
**johnn** : my mom used to have this silver necklace that she wore that she would never take off no matter what  
  
**johnn** : and my dad used to hate it bc she'd wear it to really big events but she never cared bc it was important to her and he wasn't allowed to take that away  
  
**johnn** : and when she died the necklace went to me bc I was the oldest and I usually never wear it because I'm so scared that I'll lose it and I Can't Lose It but I am rn  
  
**johnn** : but this year I got my siblings back and everything happened and so for christmas I had four copies of the necklace made and now all of the laurens children have one  
  
**little lion** : I love you so much  
  
**johnn** : I love you too  
  
**little lion** : I'm so proud of who you've become  
  
**johnn** : can you hug me please  
  
**johnn** : like I know all of my siblings just did but like they let go and I need it  
  
**little lion** : of course love  
  
**johnn** : thank you  
  
**little lion** : it's no problem  
  
**johnn** : thank you  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : I MADE LACTOSE FREE HOT CHOCOLATE FOR DAVID IM SO PLEASED WITH MYSELF  
  
**laf** : I  
  
**johnn** : I'm so genuinely enamored by all of you all the time  
  
**laf** : I'm so genuinely afraid how sappy you're being if you're gonna double back on it tomorrow  
  
**johnn** : oh no I planned on it but then alex made us fucking photo albums and hercules made us sweaters and you got me all of that nice fucking paint and we started crying and jesus christ I don't d e s er ve you  
  
**more like HUNKules** : of couRSE YOU DO  
  
**little lion** : JOHN  
  
**laf** : YOU JUST BROKE DOWN CRYING ON OUR FLOOR  
  
**johnn** : was it quiet enough that nobody noticed  
  
**little lion** : I  
  
**little lion** : yes love  
  
**johnn** : good  
  
**johnn** : no I don't!! you're all so beautiful and amazing and I love you so much and I just don't deserve you but somehow I have you and you love me and fuc k  
  
**laf** : john!! we love you too!! literally so much!! more than words could ever tell you and more than we can ever express through actions  
  
**little lion** : you mean the whole world to us john please  
  
**more like HUNKules** : you're amazing and loving and so fucking dear to our hearts that if we tried to love you any more than we do already we'd bu r s t  
  
**johnn** : I'm a blubbering mess rn omg I need to stand up  
  
**laf** : take all the time you need love  
  
**laf** : they're in our house if they have a complaint they're not going to say anything  
  
**johnn** : but they'll notice and ask  
  
**laf** : but we don't have to tell them if you don't want to  
  
**johnn** : okay I'm okay  
  
**johnnn** : I'll help you carry the hot chocolate  
  
**little lion** : thank you dear  
  
**johnn** : no problem honey  
  
**little lion** : oh you're evil  
  
**johnn** : our tv got really bright which means if I wanted to see you blush I had to go for the "kick to the shin" equivalent of sappy responses before it got dark again  
  
**johnn** : that was the quickest one I could think of  
  
**little** **lion** : unbelievable  
  
**little lion** : I love you though  
  
**johnn** : love you too!!  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : IM GOING TO KILL DAVID  
  
**laf** : I  
  
**little lion** : I TOLD HIM HIS HOT CHOCOLATE WAS LACTOSE FREE AND HE GOES ""THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR EVEN TAKING ME INTO CONSIDERATION"" LIKE OF C OU R S E I WOULD  
  
**little lion** : IM SO??? I WOULD WANT TO HUG HIM IF THE MARTHAS DIDNT ALREADY TAKE CARE OF IT  
  
**johnn** : come over here and cuddle us  
  
**little lion** : rIGHT  
  
\---  
  
**martha manning** : you're blushing babe  
  
**david** : I am n o t  
  
**martha** : yes you are and it's  a d or ab le  
  
**david** : you hate me  
  
**martha** : we dONT  
  
**martha manning** : WAIT  
  
**martha manning** : WAIT WAIT WAIT I KNOW THAT LOOK  
  
**david** : ,,,,n o  
  
**martha manning** : THATS !!!! THE LOOK YOU HAD WHEN MARTHA KISSED YOU FOR THE FIRST TIME  
  
**david** : F AL SE??  
  
**martha** : WAIT DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON ALEX  
  
**david** : NO  
  
**martha manning** : ARE YOU SURE  
  
**david** : YES MY CRUSH ON ALEX ENDED A WHILE AGO  
  
**martha** : WH  A  T  
  
**martha manning** : WHY DIDNT YOU TELL US  
  
**david** : IDK?? IT WAS STUPID AND I NEVER REALLY WANTED TO DATE HIM   
  
**david** : BESIDES IT ONLY LASTED LIKE A WEEK  
  
**martha** : !!!DAVID!!!  
  
**david** : S TOP LAUGHING INTO MY NECK  
  
**martha manning** : YOURE SO CUTE BUT AT THE SAME TIME YOU DIDNT TELL US ABOUT ALEX  
  
**david:** THERE WAS NOTHING TO TELL!!  
  
**david:** IT WAS LIKE ONE WEEK WHERE SOMETIMES I WOULD BE LIKE ""wow alex is cute but he's my brother-in-law's husband and he's also like on the 30 side of 20 which is kind of weird I really don't Want to date him but I can still appreciate the fact that I find him Kind of Hot""  
  
**martha manning** : what does the 30 side of 20 even mean  
  
**david** : he's closer to 30 than 20 but he's still in his 20's  
  
**david** : he's 27 right??  
  
**martha** : 26 I think?? john said his birthday was soon but he didn't say when  
  
**martha** : also you find my brother's husband hot that's amazing  
  
**david** : you want to tell him don't you  
  
**martha** : not if you don't want me to  
  
**martha:** john can't keep secrets from his signifs so alex will probably find out  
  
**david** : you can tell him  
  
**martha** : nice  
  
**martha** : also I love you I don't think I told you today  
  
**david** : I love you too  
  
**martha manning** : love you!!  
  
\---  
  
**martha manning** : wait if you're not blushing bc of your ex-crush on alex then ???  
  
**david** : well yknow when you Used To have a crush on someone but then you get over it  
  
**david** : and then they do Anything and like thirty alarm bells go off bc even though You're over it a part of you is like ""they know you had a crush on them!! shit!!"' and you die a little inside  
  
**martha** : yes  
  
**martha manning** : no  
  
**david** : well it's that  
  
**martha manning** : okay??  
  
**david** : ://  
  
\---  
  
**martha** : okay I was going to text you about david but what are you dOING  
  
**johnn** : ,,,,,,,,,,,nothing??  
  
**martha** : why are your hands up alex's sweater??  
  
**johnn** : bc he's very cute and it's either this or sucking hickeys into his collarbones and I'm sparing you trauma  
  
**martha** : thank god  
  
**johnn** : wait what about david?? not that you need a reason to talk to me about your boyfriend I just kind of thought  
  
**johnn** : you've never done it before so like ???  
  
**martha** : oh!! he used to have a crush on alex for like a week!!  
  
**johnn** : oh of course he did  
  
**johnn** : look at him  
  
**johnn** : and he's so sweet and he smells like cinnamon and fuck I need to stop before I have a Problem  
  
**martha** : YOU KNOW  
  
**martha** : I JUST WANTED TO HAVE A NICE CONVERSATION ABOUT MY CUTE BOYFRIEND WHO HAD A CRUSH ON YOUR HUSBAND BUT NO YOU HAVE TO MAKE IT WEIRD  
  
**johnn** : to be fair I've always been this weird you just weren't eased into it  
  
**martha** : STOP KISSING HIS COLLARBONES  
  
**johnn** : I CANT HE  L P IT  
  
**johnn** : HES ALEX AND IM GAY AND I JUST??  
  
**martha** : B YE  
  
\---  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : I got my bracelet!!  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : I think my siblings like you more than me tbh  
  
**jmadzzz** : idk how you're amazing  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : hu  sh  
  
**jmadzzz** : seriously though why would they like me better  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : you put up with me for some reason?? they relate to that struggle  
  
**jmadzzz** : thomas are you okay  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : no they're all really irritating and exhausting and I just want to cuddle with you and kiss you and be with you bc you're like the fucking Sun personified and you make me happy and you don't Drain me like they do and fuck I don't Hate them but they're not the Best people  
  
**jmadzzz** : I love you so much please don't let them get to you  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : thinking of how I get to go home in three days to you and how I get to see alex is really all that's getting me through it  
  
**jmadzzz** : I want to kill your family  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : they're not that bad!! it's just that I hate them a lot most of the time!!  
  
**jmadzzz** : I  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : idk they make me want to go get a fucking massage for six years  
  
**jmadzzz** : when we get home love  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : wait really  
  
**jmadzzz** : of course  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : I have the best fiancé in the w o r l d  
  
**jmadzzz** : you flatter me  
  
**jmadzzz** : I have to go love but you can text me whenever!!  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : omg go have christmas!! see you on tuesday!!  
  
**jmadzzz** : see you on tuesday!!  
  
\---  
  
**hugh lowercase** : you gotta s t o p  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I have  
  
**more like HUNKules** : No idea  
  
**more like HUNKules** : w h a t you're talking about  
  
**hugh lowercase** : you're doing,,,,Something to alex that's making him giggle like he can't Breathe and Everyone knows that something is going on  
  
**more like HUNKules** : he's just so  s o f t  
  
**hugh lowercase** : e w  
  
**more like HUNKules** : l is t en  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I'm just a man who's in love with his husband  
  
**more like HUNKules** : caN I LIVE  
  
**hugh lowercase** : thERES NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU LOVING ALEX JUST STOP DOING WHATEVER IT IS THAT MAKES HIM DO THAT  
  
**more like HUNKules** : holy shit are you relapsing into your crush on him rn?? bc like I Understand why you want me to stop like he's giggling but it sounds vaguely sexual bUT ALSO  
  
**more like HUNKules** : AS SOMEONE WHO USED TO HAVE A CRUSH ON ALEX WHO ONCE HEARD HIM MAKE THAT NOISE IN HIS SLEEP  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I KNOW WHAT IT CAN DO  
  
**hugh lowercase** : NO I AM NOT  
  
**more like HUNKules** : tbh though did you ever Actually get over your crush on my spouses?? like fully??  
  
**hugh lowercase** : Y E S  
  
**more like HUNKules** : honestly idk how though  
  
**more like HUNKules** : like if I had a crush on alex and then kissed him I'd be in for life  
  
**hugh lowercase** : hercules that's literally what happened to you  
  
**more like HUNKules** : oh my god wait  
  
**hugh lowercase** : unbelievable  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : you think that in thirty years we'll be sitting in our kid's apartment with their signif(s) ((if they choose to have them)) cuddling being just as cute as your parents are  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I hope so  
  
**laf** : I love you all so much and I know I say that a lot but like !!!!  
  
**more like HUNKules** : we love you too!!  
  
**johnn** : love you!!  
  
**little lion** : love you!!  
  
**laf** : oh everyone is asleep  
  
**little lion** : can we go upstairs and sleep please  
  
**laf** : of course  
  
**johnn** : let's go  
  
**more like HUNKules** : !!!  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : merry christmas thomas!!  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : don't get me wrong bc I love getting text messages bc you're my boyfriend and I love you but like  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : it's one in the morning??  
  
**little lion** : I just woke up and realized I forgot to say it  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : oh!! merry christmas!!  
  
**little lion** : I love you too btw!!  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : !!!  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : also this is going to sound really really weird but like  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : when I get back do you want to go ice skating with me  
  
**little lion** : how would that ever sound weird  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : bc you can't rollerskate so why would you go ice skating  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : and also I've been going over how to ask you for two hours now bc asking you out is still scary kind of so haha yeah  
  
**little lion** : first of all I would go bc I love you and I can kind of ice skate?? it depends on how much patience you have tbh  
  
**little lion** : and second of all you don't have to be afraid omg I love you so much???  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : for you I could Gain patience tbh I love you too  
  
**little lion** : christmas is such a Sappy holiday I love it  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : literally I told james this but coming home to him and getting to see you are all that's getting me through this whole thing  
  
**little lion** : omg are you okay  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : yeah I'm fine just I hate everyone I'm related to and I just want to go home and see the two people I love but I Can't and that's irritating  
  
**little lion** : I will kill all of them for you  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : no let them live they're rich, I'm getting married, and me and james don't own any fine china and they'll get us that  
  
**little lion** : omg you're getting married that's so cool!!  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : so are you!!  
  
**little lion** : holy shit you're right  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : omg go back to sleep please love  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : it's christmas and you told me abt how hercules and john's families are there and if I had ten extra people in my house at once I'd need the sleep  
  
**little lion** : you have se v e n siblings  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : yeah but they don't really like me  
  
**little lion** : I  
  
**little lion** : my offer to kill them is still on the table  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : s l e e p  
  
**little lion** : fine  
  
**little lion** : goodnight!! I'll talk to you tomorrow!!  
  
**macaroni fUCK** : goodnight!!

**Author's Note:**

> I really wanted to get this up sooner but I couldn't!! it's currently one thirty in the morning and I'm sO tired but I wanted to say happy holidays!! and if you didn't celebrate anything on the 25th then I hope you had a good day!!
> 
> tumblr: lol-phan-af
> 
> stay safe!!


End file.
